Existential Crisis

Changing jobs triggered a bit of an existential crisis for me.  I’d been a traditional librarian for nearly ten years.  I was proud of the title, believed I had specialized skills, and identified with the profession’s values.  Being a “librarian” was part of my identity.   It wasn’t just a job or a career path. The closest thing I can use to describe it is “a calling.”  It made me special.  Unique.      

Now I’m out of the traditional setting, and I’m wondering what I am.  My official title is “Senior Analyst” (along with around literally 10,000 other people at my company).  I still call myself a librarian.  But am I still a “librarian?”  Am I a “researcher?”  Employee #24601?  I’m not special any more even though I’m doing the work that “librarians” do without the title. 

I also can’t help feel like a bit of a mercenary; like I’ve betrayed my beliefs in the sanctity of knowledge for its own sake to keep food on the table.  Not to mention failing to stop the library from folding.   People tell me I didn’t have a whole lot of choice.  The library was going to fold whether I stayed or not.  And it’s not like I didn’t try to stop it.  I tried to stop it and I lost.  And a man (and his family) gotta eat.  I realize full well that I’m considerably more fortunate than many of my colleagues in special libraries who had their positions eliminated.  They’d love to be called “analyst” or “Employee 24601.” 

So does the setting a librarian provides their services in matter in the 21^st century?  Does the title matter?  Is a librarian by any other name still the same?  If not what differentiates me/the profession from the thousands of analysts a company/entity employs?